Services Provided

Family Mediation: Separation and Divorce and Parenting Plans

Separation and divorce can be expensive and contentious, despite the best of intentions. Communication can be strained to the breaking point, just when it’s most important to communicate.  I work with all couples – those with children and those without; gay and lesbian couples; married couples and those who have never been married.

As a skilled and experienced mediator, I help you work through difficult, hot-button issues step by step, such as:

  • Do we have to sell the house? What if we can’t sell it now?
  • How do we pay the mortgage if one of us moves out?
  • What is best for the kids? Where should they live?
  • How do we figure out child support?
  • What about alimony?
  • How do we handle our retirement accounts?
  • How do we pay the credit card debt? What do we do about other debts?
  • How do we handle a business or partnership?
  • What about college for the kids?
  • And so many other seemingly endless and overwhelming questions.

Your priorities help determine the agenda – what assets to discuss immediately, what issues to explore first. We will cover all areas relevant to you, including assessment and division of assets and debts, separate and marital property, spousal support, taxes, pets, and, if you have children, parenting plans, possible relocation issues, and child support.

I do not give you answers or tell you what to do; rather, I use my years of experience to guide you through the process and help you come up with your own practical, workable solutions.

During the mediation process, many clients find that their ability to communicate with each other improves, leading to more productive and less tense conversation, both inside and outside of our meetings.

At the conclusion of mediation, if you request, I will prepare a memorandum of agreement covering everything to which you have agreed. Any written agreement should be reviewed by your attorney before you sign it. Once it is signed by both of you, the agreement becomes an enforceable contract. After you have been separated for the requisite amount of time, one of your attorneys may file the agreement with the court and seek an order that incorporates it as part of the divorce decree.

Family Mediation: Marriage

If your marriage is in trouble and you want to try to save it, please consult with a licensed marriage counselor first. Marriage mediation is not therapy.

Consider marriage mediation if you have already tried counseling, but are still not sure whether to stay together, to separate, or to divorce.

Marriage mediation is a structured negotiation process, designed to strengthen your relationship by addressing the issues at the core of your conflicts -- over communication, finances, parenting, or other matters.

Parenting Coordination

As a Parenting Coordinator I assist parents who are heading into separation and divorce as well as those who have already completed the divorce process. Parenting Coordination is focused on helping parents make healthy decisions about their children.  An important long-term goal of Parenting Coordination is to improve communication and the level of cooperation and trust between parents. This goal is crucial, because hostility and conflict between parents is strongly related to emotional dysfunction and deterioration in the mental health of children in divorced families. 

For many parents, separation and divorce is a time when communication difficulties are heightened.  Decision-making may be fraught with tension, serving only to increase opportunities for conflict. Yet at the same time you must continue to make many important and routine decisions concerning your children.  You may find that decision-making is fraught with tension and serves only to increase opportunities for conflict.  Without an effective way to deal with the conflict, you may end up battling in and out of court, exhausting yourselves and your bank accounts and causing your children unintentional pain. 

As a Parenting Coordinator I can help you create appropriate parenting plans, build functional and enduring co-parenting relationships, and resolve ongoing co-parenting disputes — whether you are just heading into separation and divorce, or have already completed the process .

  • You may be referred by attorneys, therapists, custody evaluators, or judges.
  • You may seek parenting coordination voluntarily. I will decide with you, often with input from your attorneys, what my role will be. I can help you work through particularly difficult issues on which you have become “stuck.” If you have not yet separated, I can help you create a parenting plan that will reflect the needs of the whole family, with special emphasis on the needs of your children.
  • You may be ordered by a court to attend parenting coordination sessions. It may be due to the intensity and animosity of your conflict, or because you have been litigating parenting issues in court rather than talking them through on your own. The court order will specify the scope of my role.

 

Civil & Business Mediation

Virtually any type of (non-family) dispute or negotiation may be handled through civil and business mediation. It is a good way to resolve differences, prevent conflict escalation, and avoid the time and expense of litigation.

I have successfully mediated and resolved disputes involving:

  • neighbors
  • churches
  • personal injury
  • car accidents
  • employer/employee relations
  • real estate
  • medical malpractice
  • wrongful death
  • contracts

Mediation is particularly effective in:

  • Negotiating an ownership or partnership agreement when forming a new business.
  • Resolving disputes between principals of an existing business.
  • Renegotiating aspects of an existing ownership or partnership agreement.
  • Negotiating an amicable, desired dissolution of an existing business arrangement.
  • Resolving conflicts between businesses.

This is an outline of how I typically conduct a civil or business mediation:

  • I first meet with all of the parties (and their attorneys, if they are represented by counsel).
  • We identify the issues involved.
  • We develop a way to communicate so that each party understands everyone’s positions and concerns regarding each issue.
  • We determine the options for resolving the various issues in conflict, and discuss them in light of each party’s interests.
  • We work out the terms of an agreement acceptable to all.